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Dear Reader ,

Have you ever had that experience where you firmly believed something and then something is said and the response is something like, "Oh, I had never thought of it like that," and from that point on, your view of 'it', your belief, has changed?

This is something that I have seen happen often this week and the great thing is that once that new perspective is taken, it is really hard to go back to the old way of thinking - you can't 'unlearn' something.  And it can make a huge difference to how you feel, which you can find out more about here.

My challenge this week has been around head stones for Mum's resting place.  I would never have thought that getting a piece of stone with a few words on it would be so blinkin' difficult!   Having selected a stone we liked and phoning to order it, I was told by the stonemason that most churchyards want flat stones (the one we liked was partly raised).  So back to square one (no pun intended!) 

I then found out that there were certain dimension restrictions and so back to the book to find out what was available in those sizes as a flat stone.  Selection made and another phone call placed to 'hopefully' place the order.  But NO!  Then I was told that black granite is not allowed and gold lettering also not a good idea.  AAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH. 

And then from that point on, everything appeared to go wrong:  I dropped the car keys which then rolled right under the middle of the car necessitating me to get down on my tummy to wriggle under whilst also trying to keep control of the dog who was focussed on a cat on the other side of the road.  I can only imagine that had someone been videoing the whole scenario they'd have made £250 from a certain TV programme that shows home clips!

Then on the way home, I hit a traffic jam just around the corner from a junction that had I known there was a jam ahead, I could have taken a different route.  Instead, I crawled along for 30 minutes and upped the ante on the self pity for what a c##p day I was having!

The phone then rang (I was hands free!!) and expecting it to be another problem, it was a lovely friend who had just passed me in the other lane and for the next 20 minutes we laughed our way through the traffic jam.  I am so grateful to her for that little gesture that got me out of my mire and meant that by the time I got home, the kids did not experience Monster Mum coming through the door but someone who was still chuckling from that lovely change of state that a kind gesture had created.

If you have ever watched Pay It Forward (a fantastic film if you haven't...) then I decided to pay this kind gesture forward and today offered someone a free session with me to help her with her eating habits.   The smile on her face was lovely and I know she is now already looking at food in a different way because she now sees things from a different perspective.  

So here is a question for you... if there is something that is causing you to go AAAGGH!! can you find a way to look at it from a different angle that helps you to feel differently about it?

Until next week

Caroline Cavanagh,
Adding Zest Ltd

 

Read More About Perspectives Here


And another thing...


During my time as a therapist I have come across quite a few things that are 'unusual'.  A recent challenge was someone who has no concept of time - which is a condition called dyschronometria.  And phobias can often be interesting.  There are the normal ones; flying, spiders, birds etc but the one that sticks in my mind most is a phobia to eating chicken!  A very real one for this man and also very distressing.  However, it was not so much the 'unusualness' of the condition but the fact that after the session, he got in his car, drove to Waitrose and ordered a pre-roasted chicken that he then munched on in his car.  You can read more about that food phobia here.

Many people laugh at phobias but for the sufferers their fears are very real but the solutions often aren't.  In my experience, phobics do not feel able to go to see their GPs as they don't see it as medical, and often are very embarrassed by them so hide their fears away - adding to the impact of the phobia.

Summertime can be the worst time for phobics as more creepy crawlies and buzzy things are around, holidays appear on the horizon, doors and windows give access to wide spaces...but it doesn't have to be that way.

Dealing with phobias is one of the quickest things that I do.

So if you have been struggling wtih a phobia of any form, please know you do not have to suffer in silence.  And if you would like my help, I would love to help you. Just contact me on any of the contact methods below. 

Read More About How People Have Overcome Phobias
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Adding Zest Ltd
Lymwood House
The Flood, Middle Winterslow
Salisbury, Wiltshire SP5 1QT
United Kingdom

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Adding Zest Ltd · Lymwood House · The Flood, Middle Winterslow · Salisbury, Wiltshire SP5 1QT · United Kingdom

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